Most people aren’t going to ask about your pronouns if you present in a traditionally gendered way. If someone tells you their pronouns I think it’s polite to tell them yours too even if you think it’s obvious. It sounds like the way you’ve described yourself that your pronouns are he/him. If you find yourself around a group of queer/trans folks it would probably be contextually appropriate for you to introduce yourself as “My name is and I use he/him.” If you want to go above and beyond and do that all the time nobody will fault you that would benefit or appreciate that information. Some people may be confused or make an assumption but if you want to be an ally that can include taking the brunt of some of those conversations and teaching people why you’re doing it. Makes it more normalized.

You are pretty much always welcome to ask someone’s pronouns if you are unsure. Most trans/non binary folks will appreciate you asking because unfortunately there are a lot of cis hetero men that wouldn’t extend that courtesy or demonstrate that they’re accepting and open like that. As long as you’re respectful just ask “Hey, name, what are your pronouns? Mine are he/him.” and that will be more than sufficient. If you mess up after that do not apologize. Instead, thank them, restate your sentence using the correct pronouns, and move on. Don’t make it a huge ordeal and fall over yourself apologizing. Saying you’re sorry in that situation puts the misgendered person in the position of having to say “it’s okay” when it’s not. Thanking them demonstrates you’re aware that you made a mistake and shows that you are appreciative and trying to learn and do better.

For example: You: “He loves to skateboard.” Other person “they” You: “Right! Thank you. They love to skateboard.” then continue the rest of what you were saying.

Online can be tricky. You only really need to gender someone if they gender themselves. Everyone to me online is they until I see evidence otherwise. It makes your life easier to just be as neutral as possible.

There are definitely people out there that use unconventional pronouns. I’ve only met a few that use something other than they/them but they’re out there. It’s not just a fad or for inclusivity for the sake of it, it’s just rare. In fact there are probably people you’ve met that use they/them but they may not have been comfortable telling you that. It’s understandable, but I think it says a lot about your character that you’re curious and want to do the right thing. Thanks for asking!

Final fantasy 1-9 are on the App Store. Maybe a game that wasn’t originally in a mobile gimmick format could kill some time for you. 3, 5, 6, 7, and 9 are all very good (you don’t need to play them in any particular order. These are all more classic turn based JRPGs. There is also final fantasy tactics which is more of a grid based combat system similar to fire emblem or chess. All the stories are good and engaging

I thought about this a little more. When you asked do I believe I have less right to initiate that than they do. I actually think the answer is yes.

Taking the situation to a wider lens I am not traditionally a person that is preyed on and victimized for my body nearly as much. I don’t think it would ever be appropriate for me to initiate a situation like that with any woman. Based on cultural and historical context it would be much more likely that a man, if he were uncomfortable, would leave that situation than it would be for a woman to do the same for fear of her own safety. The power dynamic is different whether that’s real in the situation or perceived. I would never want to inflict that on someone else.

Of course men can be preyed on and put into uncomfortable or dangerous situations as well. I’m not saying anything to contradict that. No gender is a monolith but overall it’s probably a safer bet to let a woman initiate that than a man as a general rule. It’s a complicated topic and even more so when you consider it outside of the gender binary. But that’s how I perceive my role in this situation.

I was just basically saying that I wouldn’t barge into a woman’s dressing room just on my own “authority” as a gay man. I mentioned it because of one of the examples from the OP. Things like that are all about context like if we’re sharing a hotel room and someone is already in the restroom or if we’re getting into costume and need assistance. There’s mutual consent

I’m a gay cis man and was just on the phone with my best female friend. She was talking to me about an acquaintance that made her feel uncomfortable after she heard him objectifying another woman with a comment about a “slutty outfit” at a Renaissance Faire. She said something to the effect of “and that concerns me because I wear slutty outfits at Ren Faire.” and my response was “Yeah, you’re the queen of slutty outfits!” and then went on to say something actually supportive.

I think every relationship has a certain set of spoken and unspoken rules. I’ve been friends with her for well over a decade. We both poke fun at sex and gender things together and have also had many insightful, non-joking conversations about these things and both know exactly where we stand on them. It was contextually appropriate for me to call her the queen of slutty outfits. Would I say this almost any other woman? Fuck no.

I’ve had friends who are women change in front of me and vice versa to varying degrees of undress but it was always initiated by them and I never barged in or invited the interaction. Gay men engage in sexism, misogyny, etc all the time. We are not immune to it, exempt from it, or capable of being any less harmful. To think otherwise helps no one and maintains existing systems of oppression and power. Men also suffer under misogyny, gay/queer men especially so. We can be powerful allies disrupting sexism in places and situations women typically wouldn’t have access to. That’s what being a real gay best friend is

If you like DBZ you would probably like Hunter X Hunter and Yuyu Hakusho. These two are both written by the same person and have similar vibes but the story and setting are very different. HxH especially is very widely acclaimed for good reason. In this vein you may also like Black Clover.

Anime that I’d recommend in general would be Akame Ga Kill, Mahou Shouju Madoka Magicka (watch 3-4 episodes, trust the process), Parasyte, Gurren Laggann, One Punch Man, Angel Beats, Katanagatari, Made In Abyss, and Berserk (1997),

If you want to get in your feelings: Erased, Kotaro Lives Alone, and The Promised Neverland (season 1 only). Spy X Family (cute and silly but very good)

Some current very popular DBZ-esque anime is My Hero Academia, Jujutsu Kaisen, and Demon Slayer Kimetso no Yaiba.

This may not be exactly what you’re asking for but there is a video game called Baba is You that you would probably really get a kick out of. It’s on Steam, Switch, and I believe if not yet that it’ll soon be on IOS/Android.

Social Worker

Try to always have something coming up to look forward to. Whether it’s a hang out with friends, a concert, a trip to a park, whatever. Keep a calendar and stick with it even on the days when you’re not really feeling up to it. Bonus points if you’re trying something you’ve never done before. New experiences are really good at getting you out of your head and being more mindful.

This is the way

I haven’t started it yet but my next book is The Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds.

Within the last month or two I’ve read Song of Achilles, The Women Could Fly, The Book Eaters, and Babel. I’d recommend all of them, especially Babel.

They’ve been working on redoing and slimming down some of the base game to cut some of the fat. You’re not wrong about the structure. The story itself especially in the expansions 3/4 of them could stand on proud amongst the best of final fantasy stories. MMOs aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, though, I get it.

I had one in .world until it got buggy and then I moved to sh.itjust.works and don’t plan to move again unless something similar happens. I hadn’t sunk much into the other account anyway so it was no big deal

This is a low ball but I easily have 3000+ hours in FFXIV and Old School Runescape (not combined)

I’ve done some Google searches and looked at Reddit results, and I view some choice subreddits on an RSS feed. But I have not logged in to Reddit since Apollo went down. Lemmy still seems to be getting better every day. While the content drought is still there I have taken to reading a book at night before bed instead. I’m hoping that just becomes a long lasting habit in lieu of scrolling.

Formalwear for when it is hot outside. Like a summer wedding or something. It’s always fuckin miserable going to those kind of events sweating the whole time

The Strangers. I lived in a house similarly isolated with a sliding glass door just like the one in the movie where she moves the curtain and he’s right there staring in.

Violate HIPAA