Chad McTruth

i aint your moron pal

are you suggesting im lying you better not be because i dont lie EVER

thanks for asking i love telling this story

it was spring break of 1999 and i had just gotten a good deal on the rerelease of tom & jerry the movie so obviously i spent most of the day watching it several times and you know how sometimes you watch something and you really relate to a character and you just wanna embody them well thats how i felt about jerry so you already know what i did i went out and i got LOADS of cheese the good stuff too i was eating kraft singles all evening

after all that cheese and tom & jerry i was purely content so naturally i slept like a rock and dreamt good dreams and to this day can you believe it that was the best sleep ive had my whole life and sometimes i try to recreate it but its not the same and one thing that made it so special was i dreamt that my crush accidentally forgot to put on clothes how great is that

anyway that morning i asked my mom if we could call my brother so i could tell him about it and it turns out he died in his sleep that night of cardiac arrest

my big brother always gave me a gum called abc gum when i was little and it was a very cool texture that ive never seen another brand do but fortunately my brother is dead so i cant ask him where he got that gum

tell me youve never tried pizza soup without telling me youve never tried pizza soup

i help you stay grounded when speeds are high
though im not a bird i can still make you fly
im often found on the back not the front
what am i that gives your ride a cool stunt

tardypants

https://feddit.nl/comment/14728193

this made me so happy

not the kind i have

always to check for worms

at least half of it will be funny

i only generate worthless garbage for worthless garbage

oh man you think youre so smart dont you questioning the validity of a well crafted 5 paragraph shitpost let me tell you something buddy people are starving for real content not that watered down FAKE news crap theyre fed on a daily basis and if a 5 paragraph shitpost is what it takes to wake them up then so be it i mean can you believe it people are actually reading and engaging with my stuff and you’re over here complaining about the length of it what a joke you must be one of those sheep who cant even be bothered to read a whole paragraph without getting distracted by your phone or something newsflash pal people are hungry for the truth and if thats what it takes to get it to them then ill write a 10 paragraph shitpost and ill make sure its so good youll be begging for more and this was generated with a custom llama and not edited except for this last part because youre not worth my time

Umm, you just insulted the intelligence of the person you replied to.

please elaborate

The whole idea of hating on using ‘/s’ is stupid and useless

putting ‘/s’ at the end of a 5 paragraph shitpost is stupid

the title is a legitimate question and i think “/s” is a bad answer and this one isnt supposed to be very funny but ive got a schtick to keep up and it is a little funny in the context of my post history