HonkyTonkWoman

Found the riding mower:

Are those its panties around its “ankle”?

You are, in fact, correct. My heavens. The lack of journalistic integrity these days must’ve seriously damaged my ability to isolate important news from tabloid trash. I don’t know what’s gotten into me.

Folks, I admit fault. I’ll leave Elon & his tapir to their business.

You forgot the part about Elon fornicating with a tapir. Pretty critical piece of the story to exclude.

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Thanks for this. Helpful comment.

Question: Can someone report anonymously to a non emergency number?

I mean I get you probably shouldn’t call animal control or something, but if someone just really does not want to involve themselves with police/emergency services, is there a better option?

I helped open a community center in my hometown. We had more than a handful of volunteers who were brought up with a “no 911” mindset.

I guess I’m just curious if there’s an option for folks who are just flat out opposed.

Pay phone is anonymous answer, but the finger condom requirement will likely yield laziness.

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Will you please re-read my comment? I specifically asked how to report it anonymously & in no way mentioned the police.

Please please please use some basic cognitive skills here.

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What an unhelpful reply.

Honest question, you seem like a great person to ask.

In the event fingerprints weren’t a issue…

What would be the best way go about this anonymously?

But have you enjoyed the culinary delicacy that is TREET?

E: Albeit, I’d be lying if I didn’t suggest that you hold out for our true hero here in the states:

Ahem. That chlorine-washed minced amalgam has a name.

…and it comes in a can. Does your amalgam come in a can?

Well, the last guy they let have falcon killed a baby black bear & blamed it on a bicyclist…

I’m guessing they needed to sure up their ranks after that nonsense.

Write “If found, please return to Minot AFB, ND c/o Duane” on them & scatter them in various airport restrooms across the US.

May I suggest…

“A Relatively Unheard of Agreement in a Mild Shade of Aquamarine?”

Maybe it’s stunning because the queen is dead?