Now, a couple possibilities come to mind, which is that there might be some sort of borscht-making contest/hootenanny happening there that required the services of an excellent country superstar like Kash Kan’t Katch’em’s alleged so-called girlfriendAlexis. He could be taking the private plane to some important FBI business that just happens to coincide with her concert!
Russia might have sent a top-secret FBI message to Kash’s phone that just said “the code word is vodka,” and now, his programming have been activated, his body is being pulled inescapably toward Russia. (Not that we’re suggesting he drinks!)
Maybe they found some bullets at a crime scene in Russia that say “Antifa,” and he has to go ‘vestigate!
. . . Point is, he’s a serious FBI director who does serious things, and nobody laughs at him at all behind his back literally every time he leaves a room.
Of course, this is a good time to talk about Kash’s weird history with matters relating to Russia, Russia, Russia, this thing with Trump and Russia, which was not a hoax, which even Trump confirmed last week like a dumbass, with his big election document dump.
Remember the first Trump regime, or have you repressed that memory? We didn’t really know Kash Patel’s weird face and needy camera-hogging back then, didn’t see evidence every other day of what an absolutely incompetent loser he is, but if you read the coverage of the Trump-Russia collusion scandals and Trump’s first impeachment — when he tried to extort Ukraine into helping him steal the 2020 election, in exchange for the money and munitions Ukraine desperately needed to defend itself from Russia — Kash was there in the background, rubbing his butthole all over that shit.
First of all, Kash was Devin Nunes’s butt-sniffy boy when Stupid Devin — remember how we used to laugh and laugh and laugh at him all day long? — was chairing the House Intelligence Committee and doing his damnedest to defend Trump from the truth ever coming out about his campaign’s coordination/collaboration/collusion with Russia to help steal the 2016 election.
Patel wrote Stupid Devin’s stupidass “RELEASE THE MEMO!” when he worked for Stupid Devin. Remember how we laughed and laughed and laughed at Stupid Devin and Kash Can’t Memo Good’s stupid memo?
That was the memo that was supposed to PROVE! that Hillary Clinton and the Dodgy Dossier were the REAL Russia, Russia, Russia Hoax that illegally started the Russia investigation in order to persecute poor innocent Donald Trump, but because Kash and Devin were and are both incompetent buffoons, if you actually read the memo, you learned, as Wonkette explained at the time, that:
[T]he memo confirms that the FBI’s Trump-Russia investigation didn’t start because of the DODGY DOSSIER, but because of Trump campaign worker George Papadopoulos, who drunk-rubbed himself all over an Australian diplomat and told him about the conspiracies Russia was doing with Trump. So … uh … doesn’t that kind of negate the ENTIRE FUCKING POINT of this memo, which is that the DODGY DOSSIER was fake news used to start an unfair investigation into Trump?
Kind of like how Trump accidentally released documents last week that prove the Trump-Russia hoax wasn’t a hoax at all.
If a few more people in this regime knew how to read, one wonders what they might accomplish.
Cont’d: