I’m not American so I grew up hearing about peanut butter from their media. I made up this amazing idea of it, which was completely shattered when I finally tasted it.
It’s probably one of those acquired tastes like Australians with Vegemite (which I also tried according to recommendations but I probably just needed to go back in time and be born in Australia).
I still dream of tasting my imaginary peanut butter.
I am like you, also wanting a signal before interacting.
I think for me, a big reason is because I’m autistic and I won’t be able to perceive any ‘cues’ from other people, so I default to assuming they don’t want to talk unless they’re extremely explicit about the opposite.
But I think a lot of people also look for a signal, they’re just better able to read it from body language and whatnot?