Legislative universal bans of physical punishment have been implemented in 65 countries across the world. America’s attitude toward spanking in the school is very different than spanking in the home. 55% of Americans believe a child does need a good spanking sometimes. According to experts the 80%-90% of Americans are a dysfunctional home. According to Whitfield M.D. about 90% of families are dysfunctional, dysfunctional families have a high prevalence of PTSD. PTSD is likely to cause children to have bad grades. Children are likely to be spanked in American homes for poor academic performance. This points to a circular problem. Spanking has shown to alter the brain in ways similar to severe maltreatment. My solution was getting rid of spanking and adopt a method that Europe is already doing. The law holds parents as authority on education, health, and daily routines but the law treats the child as an individual citizen with the same basic rights as an adult. The child has a right to a non-violent upbringing; even psychological injuries are not allowed. I posted something similar on Reddit and I am pretty sure someone was threatening death to anyone who thinks we should get rid of parental autonomy. Do people really feel that strongly about parental autonomy? This article shows America is in the majority favor of spanking just not in schools. I am not sure why. Do we not trust the teachers to administer spankings correctly?
I think it is easy to say, noone should ever spank their child. But when you talk to doctors and ask, so what are the alternatives, they give out a lot of often very vague stuff. We don’t spank our kids, but we also have very little control over our youngest. The doctors and lots of other experts simply don’t have answers. I believe that physical punishment would probably get my son under control. But I also belive he wouldn’t be the same person. And likely he would be a much worse adult than if we suffered through his youth with little control of what he says and does.
Thank you for sharing about the lack of support you are encountering when talking to the experts on what to do. When it came to understanding myself and others I found books more helpful than the experts. So, I definitely can relate to the lack of support when it comes to talking to the experts. I wish I could help with your situation but I am nowhere near qualified to help. I really do hope you find the answers. I am really fighting the urge to put my two cents in on maybe this/ maybe that lol. But really I do hope for the best for you.
According to experts the 80%-90% of Americans are a dysfunctional home. According to Whitfield M.D. about 90% of families are dysfunctional, dysfunctional families have a high prevalence of PTSD. PTSD is likely to cause children to have bad grades. Children are likely to be spanked in American homes for poor academic performance.
None of this is from the page you linked.
Is this breaking the rules?
Arguably, yes. 1 and 4.
Gonna be kinda hard to implement bans when the bible says to beat the crap out of your kids to save their souls from Sheol. Proverbs 13:24, 20:30, 23:13-14, (and more!).
… America’s attitude toward spanking in the school is very different than spanking in the home. 55% of Americans believe a child does need a good spanking sometimes. …
I remember being in school and things like paddling (corporal punishment) were opt-out, not opt-in. I don’t know any parents that opted their kids out. I was paddled a lot in elementary school and into junior high and spent most days indoors for detention (writing).
I think by the time I reached high school, it mostly was not used, but still on the books. I don’t remember anyone getting paddled in high school.
Even back then, I thought the culture of spankings (and worse) rather strange. My parents didn’t really believe in spanking, but that was rather unusual.
Some of the parents of my friends, though? Sometimes threatened to involve me in the beatings of their children. Never happened, but seemed to be a plausible threat at the time.
Man that is tough. I am so glad I wasn’t in school when corporal punishment was allowed. I looked it up and it was still allowed but I never witnessed it and then it was gone and I was very young. I do remember parents loving the fact that they came off scary to us children. It was one of those unsettling memories that made me wonder why.
The bible says love thy neighbor as thyself. I believe he is including children here. Psalms 103:13 “like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth him that fear him.” I believe the Bible does tell parents to show children mercy and love.
My solution was getting rid of spanking and adopt a method that Europe is already doing.
Which is?..
I don’t want someone else laying hands on my child, because who knows how it’ll be handled or if handled appropriately. At least it I were to, it’d not go too far because I still love them.
If I discipline at home, it’s because asking calmly or raising my voice to show seriousness wasn’t effective. If I then send them to their room and they’re argumentative it might get more serious. I don’t just go “spanking” for no reason, and it’s definitely not a beating, either. I can’t recall the last time either kid received a spank.
Meanwhile, there were times when my sister and I got out of hand and misbehaved at the store and I’d be spanked right there in public. Or I’d be hit with the belt, or even a wooden spoon at home. I still joke with my parents I have the Betty Crocker logo imprinted on my left cheek!
I think within reason is OK to do because kids learn, “I don’t want to receive this punishment” and so if they get a spanking and are faced with it in the future for acting out or messing up, it’s a known “label” of punishment they want to avoid.
I NEVER was punished for poor academics by being spanked. Usually just grounded from electronics or riding bikes with friends. My parents would day, “let the punishment fit the crime”
First my post is about getting rid of spanking all together. In Europe the child has a right to a non-violent upbringing; even psychological injuries are not allowed. Did you know that “spanking alters children’s brain response in ways similar to severe maltreatment and increases perception of threats.” According to https://www.gse.harvard.edu/ideas/usable-knowledge/21/04/effect-spanking-brain “Our findings suggest that spanking is not an effective technique and actually makes children’s behavior worse not better” https://www.psychologicalscience.org/news/releases/spanking-linked-to-increase-in-childrens-behavior-problems.html
I am just pointing out what the scientific literature says. I don’t doubt some people love their children very much and spank. I think the science is showing something we should all be aware of.
